Scribbled at the end of my notes on the BMW M3 Sport Evolution are some unusually emotive eulogies. ‘Think M3,’ it says here, ‘and you think four-seater Porsche.’ Then there’s this hackneyed observation: ‘A boy-racer for adults.’ As you will gather from such approbation, I rather liked the M3 Sport Evolution, a wonderfully entertaining machine.

When the definitive book entitled Sports Saloons of the 20^th Century is written (it has been? Ah well), BMW deserves a whole chapter, and the M3 Sport Evolution star billing alongside the 2002 Tii, 2002 Turbo, 3.0CSL and others. Worthies have suggested elsewhere that this BMW is an irrational indulgence. It is certainly an indulgence, but it is any more irrational than, say, a Porsche 944 S2 which, at £35,682, is over a grand more than the last variant of the outgoing M3? I think not. There is little to choose between the two on performance, and the BMW also has four seats and a decent boot.

Of the 600 Sport Evolutions that BMW made, a tenth, all left-handed and either red or black, were earmarked for Britain. On the face of it, the upgrading of an ordinary M3 (£28,200) into a Sport Evolution (£34,500 basic) does not justify a £6300 premium. The law of diminishing returns is verging on the silly at this level. What you get for the extra cash, just to recap, are the results of a further workout in BMW M-Sport’s steroidal gymnasium. Extended wheel-arches accommodate 225/45 Michelin MXXs on 7.5J alloys and the car’s squat, road-hugging appearance is enhanced by lowered front suspension and an airdam that is impractically close to the ground.

Front and rear aerodynamic addenda can be adjusted, with patience and tools. No-one who uses this car on British roads is going to fiddle around with downforce, though, so particular go-faster refinement can be dismissed as a homologation ruse.

Not so the uprated engine, bored and stroked to increase its displacement by 165cc to 2467cc. This special M-Sport 16-valve four yields a heady 238bhp, which is 11 percent up on the ordinary 2.3 litre M3. Torque is also better, says BMW, though not by: with 177lb ft at 4750rpm, it is some way short of the S2’s 207lb ft. And it shows.

First (and misleading) impressions are that this car is off the pace. Driven with the usual acclimatising restraint, it is hard to believe the Sport Evolution is capable of clocking the blistering times BMW claims for it – 0.60 in 6.3 seconds, top speed 154mph. The tingly engine lacks the silk-glove delivery of the mainstream straight-six in the 325i, never mind its low-rev boisterousness, pulling without serious vigour in the lower reaches. Muscle flexing starts at 4000rpm, burgeoning power only when the tacho needle has soared beyond 5000. The last 1500rpm – from 5500 to 7000 – are the most telling. Here’s the M3 is scorchingly fast.

Competition ratios you will not find, and more’s the pity. There’s a dispiritingly big gap, for instance, between third and fourth (you notice it most when changing down) that draws attention to the need for closer stacking within the Getrag box. Notchiness mars the action of the short-throw, suede-topped lever, its gat dog-legged to the left, so first is out on a limb, rather than fifth.

You don’t get into an M3 Evolution so much as tug it on. The heavily bolstered bucket seat embraces so intimately, locking hips and thighs into the machinery, you have to push against a massive footrest to wriggle in, all the better to sense the car’s action. You sit low, nicely in command, behind a fixed three-spoke wheel, it’s rim grippily textured with rough suede (don’t think about sweaty summer palms). Pedal play comes naturally, without ankle distortion, and the switchgear is well deployed. Even more than in other BMWs, you sense the Sport Evolution has been honed by serous drivers for kindred spirits.

If the powerful, peaky engine gives the car its racy timbre, it is from the chassis that the press-on enthusiast will derive most tactile pleasure. Why can’t all cars handle like this? The suspension is pretty firm, but the ride is not uncompromisingly hard or jittery with the electronically adjustable dampers (costing £1494 extra) at their normal setting.

The final Evolution is a wonderfully taut, balanced, responsive car. Its assisted steering is not especially sharp, but it is beautifully precise, accurate and communicative. Cornering roll is resisted with iron-fist resolution, just like a competition kart, and the ample rubber does not easily relinquish grip. One corollary of the engine’s modest low-rev torque is that power oversteer is unlikely unless deliberately provoked. Roadholding is tremendous, the car’s composure close to flawless, even though its fat tyres are sometimes prone to mild tramlining, especially under braking.

The great thing about the M3 Sport Evolution is its ability to be most things to most people. It is comfortable, practical (four seats, ample luggage space), civilised (powered windows, decent heating and ventilation, reasonable noise levels), easy to drive (assisted steering, light brakes) and hugely entertaining (all those g-forces). It is also still available.

At the time of writing, BMW (GB) Ltd said it had five cars left of the 60 allocated. Production ceased last December (though the M3 convertible is still being made) and successor has yet been announced. Of all the M3s since the ‘86 launch, the Sport Evolution is dynamically the best.

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The German town of Hockenheim is perfect for comparison tests. In addition to having one of R&T European Editor Paul Frére’s favourite Greek restaurants – essential for discussing the cars after a good day of driving – it also affords access to the freedom of Autobahnen,the beauty of country roads and the majesty of Hockenheimring, a world-class race circuit nestled in the woods.

From Ingolstadt, Munich and Stuttgart we gather an Audi Coupe S2, a BMW M3 Sport Evolution and Mercedes-Benz 190E 2.5-16 Evolution II and lined them up, toe to toe and tire to tire, in and around Hockenheim. There could be no more fitting a place for these three makes to square off than Hockenheim. After all, full-on race versions of the BMW M3, Mercedes 190E 2.50-16 and Audi V8 have been chasing each other around Hockenheimring, Nüburgring and other tracks and street circuits all year in pursuit of the victor’s trophy in the Group A German Touring Car Championship.

Each of the three cars in our test is a sort of hybrid machine, its spirit placed somewhere between that of a road car and that of a race car. Each is significant as it represents the forefront of its maker’s technological abilities, from computerized engine-management systems to aerodynamics. Each is also a limited-production car that may or may not ever see American roads deserving of its talent. And so it was that we traveled to Germany and assembled three of the best and brightest “something-extra” cars that the country has to offer. We poked, prodded, tested and pushed them on a race track, experienced them flat-out on the last public frontier of high-speed driving – the German Autobahn – and enjoyed them on the lovely secondary and tertiary roads in the southern province of Baden-Württemberg.

The spiritual essences of the three cars are, of course, their engines. Motivation of our Teutonic trio is supplied by two normally aspirated dohc 16-valve 2.5 lire 4-cylinder powerplants (in the M-B and BMW) and one turbocharged dohc 20-valve 2.2 litre inline-5 (naturally belonging to the Audi).

The journey that a stock 190E 2.5-16 engine takes on its way to becoming an Evolution II engine is a short but meticulous one. Slight modifications in compression ratio, valve lift and timing, intake porting, combustion chambers, catalytic converters and computer chips combine to contribute more muscle to the Mercedes. At the end of the day, the Evolution II puts out 232bhp DIN and 181lb ft of torque compared with the stock 2.5-16’s 195bhp and 170lb ft of torque, and the tachometer allows 500rpm more reach before redlining at 7700.

As if to match its Group A rival in Stuttgart, BMW bored and stroked the stock M3’s 2.3 litre four into a 2.5, bringing its volume to within a few capfuls of the Mercedes engine. Thus stretched, the new BMW M3 Evolution engine produces 238bhp DIN and 177lb ft of torque.

Comparisons of the 2.5 litre powerplants came naturally to the drivers: “The Mercedes’ engine seems slightly less aggressive than the BMW’s (keeping in mind that the M-B is more than 300lb heavier),” began one entry in the Evo II’s notebook, “but it is exceptionally smooth for a big four right up to its 7700rpm limit.”

Another driver contrasted the two engines this way: “The BMW’s engine, which is not quite as smooth as the Mercedes’, has fair midrange torque and revs beautifully, if loudly, to the upper limits.”

Moving up in piston count, but deceptively down in horsepower is the Audi Coupe S2. Ingolstadt is justifiably proud of the S2’s deep breathing, intercooled 220bhp DIN straight 5, which descended from the Sport Quattro’s 306bhp competition engine. Although it came up about 250cc and a few bhp shy of its 2.5 litre competitors, the S2 engine was far from being the runt of our test litter. You see, if the Audi couldn’t win the horsepower numbers war, its race-bred 2.2 litre turbocharged engine – with ignition program remapped and turbo boost boosted – still approaches that magic 100bhp per litre benchmark. And the S2 engine’s torque characteristics – a significant 228lb ft cranked at an appreciably low 1950rpm – slammed the door on the two Evolution cars.

“I suspect that the Audi’s performance is quite deceptive,” wrote one perceptive editor. “It has the smoothest and torquiest engine, with very good turbo response.”

The Coupe S2 complied with that editor’s impressions by posting a 6.0-second 0 to 60mph time – fully a half-second quicker than the BMW and 0.9 sec more fleet than the Mercedes. The Audi proved itself adept not only as a sprinter, but as a quarter-miler as well, once again besting the competition with a 14.6 sec run.

The power created by each of the 4 wheeled lions in our test was transmitted through a 5 speed manual transmission. The Audi’s shift pattern is the familiar one, but the Mercedes and BMW gearboxes come with a racing shift configuration. First gear is down and to the left and the other four forward gears make up the “H” pattern. The gate for reverse is at the upper left, above 1^st.

And it was in this transmission realm that we discovered one of the few areas where all three cars shuffled their feet.

“The Mercedes’ gearbox is too notchy,” complained one notebook entry. “The M3’s gearbox is quick, but slightly notchy,” said another. Even the S2 couldn’t escape some criticism: “In hard driving, the shifter’s notchiness is magnified. The gearbox has a rubbery feel to it, with imprecise gates.”

Despite our dissatisfaction with the feel and action of the three gearboxes, we agreed that the ratios were well matched with their respective engine.

Because of the exacting nature of much of the driving we were doing, we paid a lot of attention to how well the cars reacted to steering inputs and how well the feedback through the steering wheel was connecting us to the roads. Power-assisted steering systems – rack and pinion on the S2 and the M3, recirculating ball on the Mercedes Evo II – appealed to us in varying degrees, but as a general rule, the surest way of receiving our praise was by not getting in the way of our driving. This is where the Audi Coupe S2 received some of its most stern criticism: “The Audi’s boosted steering is much too light. The boost is speed-sensitive, but the effort remains too light throughout the spectrum. This gives a disconnected feeling to the driver, one step further away from the road than I am comfortable with, especially at higher speeds on sweeping corners.”

The two Evolution cars, on the other hand, were praised for the excellence of their steering feel and turn-in, with the BMW coming out as the favourite: “The M3’s power steering is the best of the group. It is nicely weighted, has good feel and is quick around center.”

Modifying the stock suspension setups of the Mercedes 190E, the Audi Coupe and the BMW M3 for the competition versions of each was anything but a complicated matter of redesigning components or rethinking layouts for the race track. The course of action chosen by all three manufacturers was, instead, a relatively simple one of adding more girth to the cars’ already athletic suspension muscle, spring and sinew.

Throughout the two-year history of its sports-minded Evolution models, Mercedes Benz has generally left the stock 190E 2.5-16 front suspension of modified MacPherson struts, lower A arms, springs shocks, anti-roll bars and hydropneumatic levelling in place.  The primary suspension build-up on both last year’s Evolution I and our Evolution II test car involves a strengthened version of the standard sedan’s multilink rear suspension. And just to even things out, as it were, the Evo II’s suspension system is also equipped with a hydropneumatic self-leveling control system.

Tested and finalized at the Nürburgring, the Audi Coupe S2’s upgraded suspension features stiffer springs and shocks, and thicker anti-roll bars. For added chassis rigidity, a cross-brace has been installed between the front shock towers.

In creating an Evolution model of the M3, BMW has addressed one of our chief reservations about the M3 models currently zooming around in the US,: namely, handling-verus-ride. The “sport suspension tuning” version on the standard M3 (recalibrated springs, shocks, anti-roll bars and bushings at both ends with MacPherson struts and lower A arms in front, semi-trailing arms at the rear) is great for spirited driving, but a tad too stiff for comfortable everyday use. In response to this problem, Munich has endowed the M3 Sport Evolution with EDC (Electronic Damping Control), BMW’s version of cockpit adjustable shocks. Just select your current mood from the rotary dial on the center console – Comfort, Normal or Sport – and you’re off, ready for sport or pleasure, a point not missed by at least one driver: “The adjustable suspension on the BMW transforms it. I don’t like the M3 we have in the US, but this car is really different, much better. And the adjustable suspension has a lot to do with it. The Normal setting is best, with just a little body roll and still a lot of handling.”

Other editors were even more effusive in their praise of the BMW’s sportiness, “The tires grip is like spikes, and the chassis is well-high impossible to upset. The M3’s stability, handling and road feel remind me more of a race car than of a street car set up for extra-urban activities. The Mercedes, on the other hand, feels like a luxury sedan resisting the transformation from street car to track car.”

Drivers who preferred the Mercedes appreciated its ride/handling balance and its tendency to be less temperamental than the BMW: “Drop-throttle tuck-in is just right for an average driver and sufficient for an expert. The BMW has more luck, which makes it better for an expert driver.”

Although there isn’t any mention of Audi’s full-time all-wheel-drive system in the proper name of the Coupe S2, the car is definitely a Quattro, with all of the best and worst traits that go along with that.

The first entry in the Quattro’s credit column is the extra stability and peace of mind that come with having four wheels pulling for you instead of just two. The Quattro system features a Torsen center differential and a rear differential that can be locked manually from inside the car by pressing a button.

The S2’s Quattro edge was instrumental in enabling it to keep up with the BMW and Mercedes on snakey, twisting roads, the awd making up for the rear wheel drive cars’ advantage in rubber: The Audi gave pursuit on 205/55ZR-16 tires, while the BMW rode on 225/45ZR-16s, and the M-B was hoofing on 17-in. wheels shod with 245/40ZR-17 tires.

So what price does the Audi Coupe S2 have to pay for its four footed stability? Well, all-wheel drive cars from the Subaru Justy to the Porsche 911 Carrera 4, understeer and the S2 is no exception. “Although the Coupe S2 is very forgiving and easy to drive at speed (it has a fair amount of body roll), it understeers – almost to the point of being frustrating at times,” lamented one of the editors.

The added weight of the Quattro system aggravated the condition, and the Audi ended up behind the BMW and Mercedes (which exhibited better balance and more poise) in high-speed transitional maneuvers like our slalom testing.

As far as top-speed runs go, we managed to find a few rare miles of Autobahn that weren’t overcrowded, so we were able to stretch the cars’ legs a bit. Our three coursers were all so smooth and tracked so steadily at their preset limits – 154mph for the Audi, BMW and the Mercedes (manufacturers in Germany have agreed upon a limited top speed of about 1555mph for their sedans) – that it almost made the thrill of speed without legal limits seem common. The kick was in how each car got there: the Coupe S2’s turbo whining and reaching out for more power, the Evolution II’s engine building toward a peak as the revs increased; and the M3 Sport Evolution’s engine pulling relentlessly up through its wide powerband.

Braking is a crucial aspect for cars of this caliber, so it pleases us to report that the stopping characteristics of all three competitors were excellent. The Mercedes and BMW (both sporting beefier disc brakes than their non-race-ordained counterparts) were nearly parallel performers, while the Audi had to give up a few feet to its lighter rivals. ABS, fitted to all three cars, takes the variable of driver skill out of the equation for quick stops. Only the Audi, however, offers the added option of an ABS override button for drivers who like to take threshold braking into their own hands.

Our notebook contained laudatory remarks for the braking of all three cars, but it was track driving that really allowed us to test the mettle of the cars’ braking system: “The Audi’s brakes got a bit spongy after a track session with some fairly hard braking.”

“The Mercedes’ brakes are excellent; I experienced no fade after 20 consecutive fast laps on Hockenheim’s short circuit.”

As any peacock will tell you, being voted top bird in the aviary isn’t everything – how you show off your feathers counts for a lot. By the same token, the Mercedes-Benz 190E 2.5-16 Evolution II didn’t garner any winning votes in the performance category. But it attracted more attention than the other two “birds” combined. Being a 4-door sedan had a little to do with it: The Evo II is slightly longer, wider and lower than either the 2-door BMW or the Audi Coupe. But what really pushes the Mercedes over the top as far as looks go is its sensational, trunk-mounted rear spoiler. No other aerodynamic piece on the car can even approach it. The snarling fender blisters, adjustable front air dam and aero rear bumper play functional second fiddle to the most outrageous wing since the Plymouth Superbird.

The BMW’s adjustable rear wing looks half-hearted by comparison. Munich lowered the M3’s nose by about a half-inch while creating the Sport Evolution, and it flared the fenders even more to accommodate the SE’s wider-than-stock-M3 tires. But the BMW is still no match for the Mercedes in the double-take department, although most of us agreed that the overall appearance of the BMW was more integrated and less tacked-on-looking than its Evolution counterpart from Stuttgart.

Then again, it’s hard to argue with the M-B’s 0.30 coefficient of drag (the BMW’s is 0.35). A ride-height adjustment switch, located on the dash, allows the Mercedes to hunker even closer to the ground for a little extra aerodynamic advantage.

Another important part of the Evolution II’s air management is an opaque plastic deflector fitted over the upper portion of the rear window. This piece was a constant source of complaints because it reduced the driver’s rearward vision dramatically. We understand that we are not alone in our frustration with the deflector because at least one M-B project engineer has cut out a large section from it on his personal Evolution II.

The Audi Coupe S2 is distinguished from other Audi Coupes principally by its new front-end treatment (based on the V8 model), special 5-spoke alloy wheels and S2 badges placed front and rear.

One would be hard pressed to find a better mix of sporting-yet-comfortable interiors than in these three cars. The Audi was generally looked upon as the comfort leader and the BMW as the race driver’s choice, but all three basted snug, supportive seats, grippy steering wheels and big, readable gauges.

The Mercedes’ interior characterized by the feeling of businesslike austerity that German cars are known for. That isn’t a complaint, just an observation. One editor, in fact, could have stood with a little less opulence in favour of lightening the car’s load: “Comfort is quite acceptable for a car in which handling is a priority,” he noted, “although I would prefer a car not so burdened with weighty gimmicks such as air conditioning and electric windows.”

Such restraint was shown in the BMW, which, while it did have air conditioning, had manual-crank windows. There is an air of race readiness about the M3 Sport Evolution’s cockpit. The tactile sensation of the steering wheel wrapped in brushed black leather is enough to get one itching to do hot laps. The distinctive BMW Motorsport blue and red, stitched into the upholstery of the M3’s superb seats, adds to the effect.

In the Audi, the stitching says “Quattro,” and the seats are just as nice. Our Coupe S2’s seats were done up in a green fabric that was designed to complement the lush, deep green color of the car’s exterior paint. The Audi’s elevated comfort level was noted by all. Its light gray faced gauges made an impression on us as well, earning praise from some, while others thought they looked gimmicky.

Our final tally found the editors evenly divided between the BMW M3 Sport Evolution and the Audi Coupe S2 as the sports car of preference.

“I was astonished that the Audi was my choice as the winner among the three cars,” confessed one driver. “I liked it best because of the all wheel drive, and I thought it was the best all-around car. It would be a great skier’s car, for instance, and it’s easy to drive every day as well. If I had to buy one car from the bunch, it would be the Audi.”

“For me, the M3 Sport Evolution is the easiest to drive of the three cars in this test,” responded a second editor. “Whether I was running it around Hockenheimring, tooling through the city, or opening it up on the Autobahn, the BMW felt right at home. With just enough gear selected, the power rolls on beautifully, and the engine pulls like a demon.”

A third editor put the debate into perspective by saying. “The Audi is the most civilized of the trio, but the M3 is the greatest fun of the group.”

And the Mercedes-Benz 190E 2.5-16 Evolution II – still a knockout performer – got stuck somewhere in the middle, playing bridesmaid to one car that was a better road automobile and to another that was a better Evolution.

The gap between the Mercedes and the other two cars is widened even further when price is taken into consideration. At $72,960, the Evolution II is easily the most expensive car in the group, followed by the M3 Sport Evolution at $56,700. The quick and comfy Coupe S2 stands out as the bargain of the field tagged at $45,700. True, the Audi is a bit less exclusive than the other two contenders – Mercedes is only building 500 Evo IIs (and all are spoken for). BMW is drawing the line at about 600 Sport Evolution M3s – but it also has the best chance of finding its way to North America.

Until then, we can take comfort in our memories of the race track in the woods, Baden-Württemberg’s back roads, the fleeting wonder of the Autobahnen and the excellence displayed by our three favourite traveling companions.

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So it’s farewell, then M3. BMW’s punchy little four-cylinder road-racer bows out after four and a half years, a victim not so much of the recent model change, claims MW, as of uncertainty over future Group A motor racing rules; will the formula be for two-litre or 2.5 litre engines, and should BMW respond to this with a four or a six?

Clearly, the answer to this is that a four would make a more effective race engine, but a six is a lot nicer for the road. If life were more simple, the argument could be based around these two facts, but it isn’t, so it can’t be. What is certain is that while the ‘normal’ two-door versions of the old 3-series, as well as the Calbrio and Touring, continue in production until the summer, the M3 is knocked on the head.

So the exciting little coupé become an instant classic, or it would do if we were not in our present position in the economic cycle, to quote the Prime Minister’s tidy cuphemism. You can pick up a decent, low-mileage M3 for a very enticing price these days.

Attractive thought his proposition may be, it would be much nicer to have one of the rarer Evolution models, which go significantly faster. They also cost quite a lot more, and you may remember that our verdict on the Sports Evolution was that it was a fine car “but hardly worth a 22 percent price hike.” This is the cue for the Hartge M3-260; you buy a used M3, go to Birds UK, the Hartge agents, and pay £5068 for a high-performance engine conversion. You then have an M3 with Evolution performance but at considerably lower cost. Our test car’s alterations were carried considerably further than this, not least by moving the driver’s seat from left to right, but also with work on the suspension, wheels and tyres, and interior. This brings the conversion cost up to £16,372 (including taxes).

That is quite a lot of money, but the price of the engine conversion is simply justified by the straight line. The Evolution we tested, in less turbulent air, was 2mph faster, and the standard car 7mph slower.

Hartge’s claim is for peak torque of 218lb ft at 5,000rpm. The bad news is that nothing much happens below about 2,000rpm in the top two gears, and this is borne out by the figures. But the good news is that – unlike the Evolution – the Hartge has a significant advantage over the standard M3 when it has climbed on to its cam – and it can spin all the way to 7,700rpm without coming to harm.

If you’re a lazy driver who likes to slog around in top gear once you’re over 200mph, the standard M3 will provide better acceleration all the way to 100mph, and it is only from about 80mph onwards that the other two cars begin to get moving seriously. But if you drive like that, why do you want an M3?

The Hartge engine is much like the Evolution’s in its character and in the noises it makes. It’s a bit coarse, pretty noisy, but highly effective, and actually a good deal smoother than it sounds.

To achieve all this, the engine modifications are substantial: only the standard block and cylinder head are retained, and all major moving parts are replaced, including a new forged crankshaft with eight balance weights and a vibrations damper. The bore is increased from 93 to 94mm and the stroke from 84 to 93mm. New camshafts incorporate wide valve overlap, the valves themselves are gas-flowed, and the exhaust system is all new.

Hartge’s favoured tyres for this car are Yokohamas (the omni-directional type, not the ‘semislick’ 008s), 235/45s on massive 17in diameter rims, 7.5J at the front and 8.5J at the rear. However, these were not available at the time of our test, so instead  it ran on Pirelli P700s of the same size.

Standard tyre size is 205/55 VR 15, and I’d be happier with that as an everyday compromise, even without taking into account the saving of £3,214 for the distinctive three-piece rims and tyres; with this less muscular-looking set-up, perhaps you do not get so much outright grip in the dry, but it is a more comfortable car to be in when the weather turns nasty, especially if there’s any standing water. However, I am sure I’ll be in the minority in this, because there is undoubtedly more posing value in the car when it is sitting on those gumball arch-fillers.

A further saving would be the Hartge/Bilstein sports suspension, as you’d not want that without the larger tyres. This consists of lowering the ride height all round by 25mm, fitting rising rate springs and gas-filled dampers. However, I found this firm but never jarring, and much better suited to British roads than some Hartge conversions have been before essential softening has been carried out by Birds.

Our test car, in case it might be used for circuit driving, was also fitted with Group N discs; wisely. Birds does not recommend this for normal road use, and the standard system, powerful enough for most purposes and very progressive, would be preferable.

Some potential purchasers of the M3 in Britain have been put off in the past by BMW’s refusal to build a right-hand drive version, which would not be cost-effective for such a low-volume model. However, as you can see from the photograph, the M3-260 we drive here has been converted (an operation for which Birds charges £4,790). It’s certainly a highly professional job, because you can’t ‘see the join’, and the only occasion on which we noticed any squeaks was in the tight, banked bend at the end of Millbrook’s acceleration straight, where stresses are applied which would not be experienced in normal driving conditions on the road.

Though we wouldn’t spend our money on some of the changes wrought to our test car, we unhesitatingly recommend this engine conversion; it delivers Evolution performance at a reasonable cost and with no penalty in refinement or fuel consumption (we average 20.4mph overall).

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In early spring or late autumn, one could do these twenty-four Alpine passes in twenty-four hours and throw in a detour to Switzerland for good measure. But at midsummer, the Alps are one big picturesque parking lot. To make things worse, 1990 saw the collapse of the autobahn bridge in the Inn Valley. which is one of the main arteries to and from northern Italy. As a result, the alternative routes were busier than usual, and even the secret paths were infested with hidden radar traps and aimless Dutch tourists.

We left Munich at six a.m., raced southwest to Garmisch, averaging a cool 127 mph, and felt like Messrs, Berger and Senna on their way to a business meeting. At the foot of the Fernpass, however, fast forward suddenly changed to slow motion. Although it was not yet even breakfast time, the mountain road was packed like the Brooklyn Bridge on a Friday evening. We jumped queue for a little while but gave up as the gaps became more and more marginal.

Other road users tend to treat the BMW M3 with due respect, but their eyes tell you that deep within they dislike the shirt-sleeved bat-mobile. Why did we pick the M3, mere months before the car will be replaced by a more modern and less conspicuous model? Because it is a fantastic driving machine, a fun car tailor-made for this sick-bag slalom across three countries. Its body sports flared wheel arches that can accommodate the gumballs of a track racing car, its suspension was redesigned for better handling and road holding, and its four-cylinder engine is a relic of the a glorious past when, in 1983, an M-Powered Brabham won the Formula 1 World Championship.

The base-line M3 engine delivers a healthy 215 bhp, which used to be enough to drive circles around a 170-bhp 325i. But now that the new 325i is out, with 192 bhp on tap and a top speed of 144 mph, the power train magicians of the Motorsport division had to reach deep into their special effects pockets to create and even stronger range topper. Badged Sport Evolution, this highly tuned M3 is equipped with a new 2.5-liter, sixteen-valve four that develops 238 bhp. Although the production was limited to a mere 500 units (all sold within a few weeks, none in America), chances are that a similar-perhaps even more powerful-version will appear in the 1991 racing season.

To escape from the frustrating route bristling with buses, caravans, campers, and other transit lemming, we decided to make a detour to the Kühtai Valley. Instead of taking the direct route to the Ötztal, photographer Newton suggested a loop via the Silzer Sattel. A splendid idea-there was absolutely zero traffic, the panorama looked as if it had been installed by Eastman Kodak, and the perfect road was obviously designed by the Lord Himself for occasional interludes of very worldly oversteer. The M3 flew up paradise trail like a four-wheeled mountain guide who knew every step blindfolded. Performing one stem turn after the other, the black blitz indulged in drift angles that were modest only where the soft shoulder fell straight into the echo forest.

The following drive to the Timmelsjoch summit turned out to be a handicap run with international participation. Once again, the Dutch excelled by steadfastly refusing to use the rear-view mirrors or turn indicators. At the border crossing to Italy, the metal centipede was temporarily halted by a cycle race. It was grand casino from bottom to top: lots of single-track sections, lots of ambitious cyclists, and lots of brain-dead stopping in the middle of hairpin bends for this year’s scenic portrait of papa, mama, and the bambini in the Fiat. A kingdom for the Italian version of the encyclopedia of foul language!

A noon, we stopped for lunch and ordered a round of unleaded for the chariot and its charioteers. The car drank 14.5 gallons, which indicated an average consumption of 18 mpg. The M3 was a fit as a fiddle. The water temperature gauge had not moved, the oil level was right up on the mark, and the crackling brakes were hot but by no means fuming. The driver, on the other hand, showed the first gins of battle scars. My back was embossed with the tread pattern of the 225/45ZR-17 Michelin MMX tires, my buttocks had been remolded by the rather narrow bucket seats, and my palms were burning because the M3 Sport Evolution’s steering wheel is trimmed in sandpaper suede.

But a true enthusiast knows no pain, so we headed straight for the Jaufenpass, which links San Leonardo and Sterzing (Vipiteno, in Italian). From there it’s only a stone’s throw down to Bozen- or Balzano, as the Italians prefer to call it. Since the autostrada was chockablock with southbound sun worshippers, the M3 had no chance to display its 155-mph top speed. We left the tin melange at Bolzano Nord, seeking and eventually finding the incredible Rosengartenstrasse. It consists of no fewer than fifty-eight tarmac garlands that rise from the Eiscak Valley. The deserted spiral staircase was an ideal playground for the M3: first gear, second gear, brake, change down, turn in, change up. This is the stuff ashen-faced passengers are made of.

Next on our checklist was the Dolomites, which harbor about three dozen spectacular passes. One of the less attractive climbs is the Karepass, which would be well suited as a natural stage for the sequel of The Planet of the Apes. A few miles up the road, we said auf Wiedersehen to south Tyrol and buon giorno to the truly Italian province of Belluno. Spaghetti land welcomed us with two tough arm twisters names Passo di Valles and Passo di San Pellegrino. The latter is the source of the San Pellegrino water that enjoys enormous popularity among Europeans trendies who are not that Perrier crazy anymore.

Up here, it’s bitter cold even in summer. Because of the prevailing strong winds, the chamois never leave home without crampons, and the trout in the crystal-clear mountain lakes are half-frozen even before the fishmongers arrive with the coolers. We enjoyed the change of temperature because the all-black M3 was a sauna on wheels-despite the noisy sunroof and the ventilation system that works adequately in other 3-series models. For a car costing $57,000, the Sport Evolution is rather poorly equipped. Anti-lock brakes, power steering, and central locking are standard, but a sunroof costs extra and so do electric windows, music, and the desirable air conditioning, which was only fitted to a handful of vehicles. Purists apparently prefer to sweat.

By five p.m., my hands hurt, my arms hurt, my legs hurt, and my bum hurt most of all. To relieve the pain, we bunkered an overdose of Gelato Motta ice cream followed by a bottle of San Pellegrino from the pond around the corner. After the calorie shock, we were fit for the final five passed of the day: Rolle, Cereda, Aurine, Duran, and Cibiana. believe it or not, these hills provide more entertainment than a season ticket for the Magic Mountain. The menu prepared by the Italian road architects contains countless crests and hairpins, jumps and dives, ess-bends and dogleg bends, changing surfaces and changing radii, and bottlenecks that act like rapids when they disgorge the dammed-up traffic.

The corners add up to an intoxicating rhythm. Hard driving becomes a concert impromptu: You know how to play the instrument but never see more than two or three notes ahead. After a while, everything you do is routine; beyond that, the routine turns into a trance. The movement becomes more and more automated, and you go faster, but without losing the quintessential smoothness.

By now, the brakes are red-hot. Whenever you tough the pedal, discs and pads instantly lock jaws. Glorified by the pervading euphoria, even the gnarled, necrotic five-speed gearbox suddenly feels as elastic as a young tree. The accurate power steering is a jack-of-all-trades that coordinates action, reaction and Providence. And the tires, when pushed to the limit of adhesion, just keep juggling all the forces to resolve the crucial rule of three that determines grip. slip angle, and directional stability.

But the heart of the M3 is of course that raucous sixteen-valve four-cylinder engine. The displacement of the Sport Evolution variant was increased from 2302 to 2467 cc. As a result, the power output went up from 215 to 238 bhp at 7000 rpm, and the maximum torque climbed to 174 pounds-feet, available at a high 4750 rpm. Among the supporting measures are bigger inlet valves, a hotter camshaft profile, sodium-filled exhaust valves, and an improved oil cooling system for the pistons. The 2640-pound winged warrior from Munich can accelerate in 6.5 seconds from 0 to 62 mph, thus beating the new 192-bhp 325i by a comfortable 1.4 seconds.

We rejoined civilization in the Pieve Valley, which serves as a convenient diretissimo to go from eat Tyrol to the Adriatic Sea. To unwind, the M team resorted to an unfailing recipe that included vitello tonnato, capretto al forno, and vino rosso. Although the cheapo roadside hotel was haunted by thundering trucks and a merry wedding party, we had no trouble going to sleep. After 7536 bends, the body will listen only to the noses it really wants to hear.

The alarm went off at 7:30 a.m., just in time for fresh croissants and a large bowl of white coffee. the proprietor watched us from behind the counter, and he even came running after us as we were about to enter the M3. A car fanatic like most Italian men, he would not let us go until we had explained all the details that distinguish the Sport Evolution from an off-the peg M3. Among them, he was told, are the lowered suspension, the cross-spoke allow wheels, the contrasting stripes on the bumpers, the bigger front wheel-arch cutouts, the additional cooling ducts to the radiator and reinforced brakes, the thinner and thus lighter glass, a more adequate 17.1-gallon fuel tank, and the body-hugging sport seats draped with silly red safety belts. But most obvious alteration concerns the much more substantial, fully adjustable wing work, which reduces front axel lift to zero while increasing rear axle downforce. Although the stuff hates curbs and automatic car washes, it does add to high-speed straight-line stability.

We left Pieve a little before nine a.m., heading for the Passo del Zovo, which looked from a distance like a stairway to heaven. From here it’s only a few miles to the famous Passo Tre Croci and to the Col San Angelo where Reinhold Messner, that mountaineer and adventurer par excellence, learned to climb. The breathtaking panorama has since become a main tourist attraction. Once the domain of eagles, marmots, and ibexes, the Dolomites are nowadays strangled by droves of sightseeing buses and a motorized string of pearls that stretches from Cortina d’Ampezzo to Bruneck.

Monuments like the passes named Staulanza. Falzarego, Giau, Prdoi, Campolongo, Sella, and San Antonio are crumbling away as cars send their carbon dioxide messages into the increasingly polluted alpine air. Even up here, humans have taken over from nature. Above us, we had difficulty counting the hang gliders; around us, the cliffs and rock faces were dotted with climbing addicts; below us, we an endless trickle of hikers, mushroom pickers, and mountain bikers. Past the Grodnerjoch (Passo di Gardena), this open-air zoo ended as abruptly as it began. One the way to the Brennerpass, the trucks started to take over again, and up the Zirlerbert it was business as usual, with one slow moving Trabant paralyzing its entire wake.

We arrived in Munich slightly ahead of schedule, feeling tired and proud as we as somewhat guilty and disillusioned. The M3 lived up to our every expectation, but we would love it even more without the fender flares and without the massive fuselage that requires the clearance of air traffic control before you’re allowed to turn the ignition key. It does not come as a surprise that BMW is already working on a less ostentatious follow-up to the M3 that should be out in early 1992. As soon as the new model hits the road, we’ll be there to queue for another marathon ride. How about entering the 1993 Beaujolais Primeur wine run?

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